What started as a sidewalk conversation turned into a popular virtual workshop. Developed in the summer of 2023 and offered numerous times since, “Five Steps to Discovering Professional Joy” has engaged numerous participants throughout the 鶹ƵUniversity campus community.
“I am by no means an expert on the topic of joy, but I do recognize that our personal and professional lives are intimately intertwined, and I do wonder about how to be joyful even in the midst of challenging circumstances,” says Hendricks Chapel , who leads the online session. “I suppose one of the reasons the workshop has become popular is that each participant is welcomed as an authority of their experience, together we discover how to perceive those experiences in different ways, and together we discern how professional achievement and personal joy can best grow together.”
When talking about how to find joy in professional life, Konkol begins with the image of an old-school thermostat.
Konkol uses a thermostat metaphor to teach about joy.
“I think it’s a powerful image and recognizes that each and every one of us—as leaders, as professionals—are thermostats,” he says. “A thermometer only takes the temperature, but a thermostat is about changing the conditions that offer an environment by which you and others can thrive. It’s about putting your hand on the dial and changing the temperature, to create the conditions that move a couple of degrees towards joy.”
Konkol offers one-hour virtual workshops for members of the campus community—from faculty and staff to alumni—on how to find joy in the work they do each day. He will offer the workshop again on from noon to 1 p.m. (in partnership with the Office of Human Resources) and in January (in partnership with the Office of Alumni Engagement).
Through the teachings of various leaders, such as the Dalai Lama and the late Desmond Tutu’s collaboration on “The Book of Joy,” Konkol shows the difference between happiness and joy, and how joy can be embraced and shared even during the storms of personal and professional life. When speaking to the specifics of a workplace environment, Konkol says, “Happiness is often temporary and based on something happening to you, while joy is about sustained purpose and meaning, including the meaning we can find during difficulties. I suppose happiness is a moment and joy is more of a movement.”
During his most recent workshop, Konkol offered participants five steps for finding professional joy:
1. Stop hoping for a better past. “So many of us, including me, have watched the ‘Back to the Future’ movies and ever since have been praying for the time machine to show up, take us back in time and undo that really stupid thing we did! Because, wow, we wish we could do that over. I have yet to receive that time machine and I have found that hoping for a better past has generally been a waste of time. We can learn from our past, but we can’t change it. We can receive insights from our past while not being trapped by our past.”
2. Choose to be kind, anyway. “I think the most important part is ‘comma, anyway.’ We cannot control how others act, but we can control how we respond, and if we are only kind to those who are kind to us, then we are thermometers and not thermostats. I have come to believe that kindness, while often seen as weakness, actually requires a great deal of strength, and I think that one of the ways that we experience joy in our lives is through the choice to be kind.”
Brian Konkol
Konkol tells the story of Steve Wilkinson, the legendary tennis coach at Gustavus Adolphus College in Minnesota. Wilkinson built a whole philosophy around tennis and developed a camp called Tennis and Life. “He wraps all these messages around the game, and one of them is ‘you can’t control what people serve to you, but you can control what you return,'” Konkol says. He also references the given by , professor of English in the College of Arts and Sciences, at 鶹ƵUniversity’s 2013 Commencement, which attracted global attention. “Never underestimate the strength of kindness,” Konkol says.
3. Replace “but” with “and.” Here, Konkol envisions an old-school gumball machine. “I think about the colors of the different gumballs representing all the different things that we experience on a given day. Things that are happy, things that are sad, things that are wonderful, things that are terrible. People that are kind, that are cruel, communities that are divided, communities that are united. Every one of those colors on those gumballs represent life,” he says.
When he counsels people who are struggling, Konkol offers this advice: “There’s no ‘but,’ it’s ‘and.’ We can experience a whole menu of emotions all at once. We can have joy when we stop apologizing for whatever it is that we’re feeling, and instead learn how to best embrace what we are feeling and explore how to use all we are feeling to create and sustain something good for us and for others,” he says.
“If you stand on the main stage of Hendricks Chapel and look toward the front door, you see text on the rim of the chapel’s ceiling. If you look immediately to your right, there is an ampersand, the symbol for ‘and.’ And if you look immediately to your left, there is also an ampersand. When you stand at the center of the stage looking outward, you literally physically stand in between the ‘ands,’” he says. “Paradox is quite remarkable. Instead of either/or, we can embrace both/and. Division and unity, happiness and sadness, joy and despair. We can exist with the fullness of our humanity,” he says.
4. Be a role model, not a role mirror. “How do we model the type of world we want to live in and not mirror the world that we do live in? Model, not mirror. Thermostat, not thermometer. I think it’s important for us to consider our habits and ask ourselves, how are they working for us? How are we impacting others? Part of the way we experience joy professionally is modeling, not mirroring, how to exist in community. I’m convinced in our professional lives when we’re role models and not role mirrors, when we’re thermostats and not thermometers, it creates positive change, not just for a moment but for a movement,” Konkol says.
5. Call people in instead of calling people out. “Instead of pointing a finger at someone, why not use those fingers to wave people in? One of the ways I think we experience joy is by welcoming people into the conversation, especially those with whom we disagree. Oftentimes we think about people we disagree with, kind of like we think about trash, and we just want to throw them out. What I appreciate about that metaphor is, you never actually throw anything out, we only throw it out of sight. It’s never actually gone. It’s the same with people. They’re there, so why not call people into a conversation, into a relationship? Empathy is important here. Where we can engage with curiosity rather than judgment, where we can listen to understand instead of respond,” Konkol says.
“I find that these five steps are in many ways like turning a dial of joy in our professional lives,” Konkol says. “So many people are dealing with so much in their lives. I am convinced that seeking joy is one of the ways we can actually make the world a far better place, especially for those who are struggling.”
At the conclusion of his presentation, Konkol suggests not writing out a “to-do” list, but a “to-be” list. “Write out five things that say ‘who must I be today?’ Perhaps I can say I’m going to be energetic, I’m going to be kind, I’m going to be strong, I’m going to be strategic,” he says. “A ‘to-be’ list allows us to live with a sense of intention and provides us with the opportunity to see that joy is not about waiting for the rain to stop, but it’s about learning to dance in the rain. It is saying ‘here’s who I’m called to be today.’ Regardless of what the temperature is, it’s saying ‘This is how I choose to show up in the world. This is who I choose to be.'”
“I’m convinced that each and every person, in their own way can turn that dial. You can be a thermostat and not a thermometer, and bring some joy to your life, bring some joy to your world,” Konkol says. “So that all those around you can change the dials of their professional lives and turn them just a couple degrees towards joy.”
